the year we called a christmas do over.

the stomach flu stole december 24th.

but it couldn't steal christmas.

we called a christmas do over. 

so we had christmas. just a day late.

'our' christmas eve began with daddy's pancakes.

and a still dragging, somewhat sad louie.

who didn't want to be in her bed.. only the floor.

she wouldn't even rouse herself to come open the christmas eve present..

hungry hungry hippos.

happy, happy kiddos.

i consoled the straggler and was able to convince her to leave the floor and come be with us..

but she never got too excited about it.

poor sad louie.

every time i found her, she was in another corner of the floor. being sad.

you can not imagine the noise level nor the intensity that these hippos were satisfying their hunger with.

  

i set lucienne up on the big chair so she could watch the game..

she was not impressed.

 after the hippos had eaten their fill , we cozied up by the fire and watched the grinch.

grayson only cowered once. he's not the grinch's biggest fan.

penelope didn't seem to mind him though.

an early bedtime was in order for the fit throwing sad louie.

our first note to santa and mrs. claus was written. 

some days we believe in santa and some days we don't.

some of us believe sometimes while some of us believe never.

we have a very fluid relationship with st. nick based on

 ambiguity, logical reasoning, and an undying love of creative imagination.  

 i simply tell the kids the truth...

i in fact have never seen santa so i can't tell you that he is real.

i have heard stories all my life of his shenanigans and whereabouts. 

it seems a lot of people do believe.. 

but i have never been to the north pole and can neither confirm nor deny his existence.

:)

as darkness draws up, beds are made under the boughs. 

stories are told, books are gathered.

magic happens. 

and some time between little eyes closing and morning light dawning..

this happens.

this is the view from my bed. 

the scent of pine, lights twinkling, little hearts peaceful slumber.

i can see their childhood memories taking shape before my eyes.

there is a moment right then.. before i turn off my light.. where i am so profoundly grateful..

that my heart flip flops in my chest and i think i might cry or laugh or both.

and then morning. 

5 a.m. was able to be corralled into 7 a.m.

and was resuscitated with strong coffee and bing crosby's croony swoony voice.

  

each child has a yarn string by their bed that they ravel and chase through the house until they find their stocking.

the secondary gift of the raveling yarn is a solid ten minutes to drink your coffee topped with fresh whip cream and let your eyes and heart open to the day.

which i need.  :) 

 

after stockings are opened we spent a couple of hours eating and playing. 

somehow this beloved thomas train who was lost forever in a disciplinary action earlier in the year, made it into a stocking and found his way back to grayson's arms. :)

ari started planning her directorial encore (remember her 5th birthday?:))

 with a new book of plays about ancient israel.  

i fielded questions for the rest of the day like "can you see emma and claire as goats?" :)

daddy--err..santa was so good to me. especially since i forgot him. :(

i got lots of chocolate and the white christmas dvd to replace my antiquated vhs version.

and wonderfully sweet handmade gifts.

a family storybook and a lovely bracelet. :)

it was christmas morning perfect.

and then the surprise.

we usually don't really do presents besides our stockings.

but this was the year.. i could feel it.

it had been on my bucket list forever...

 i imagined us bringing it out, setting it up under the tree, adding to it each year..

a christmas train. 

it went over well. :)

 

we spent the rest of the day as train conductors..

and bake shop owners..

and forcing nella to take silly pictures.

really mama? didn't i already put on that ridiculous green hat for you?

sweet pea all you have to do is stick out that silly pointy tongue like you do every five minutes..

there it is. :)

all she really wanted to do was practice her rolling since she had her first successful roll over in her bed the night before.

arianna had a few recipes that had come highly recommended by tumtum and nutmeg that she wanted to try.

'sugared ants'. 

which turns out weren't actually ants .. but raisins. much to every one's relief. ;)

since i wasn't entirely convinced the stomach plague had left for keeps i wanted to keep the christmas dinner low key.  

i steered clear of insects of all sorts and made pan fried salmon, sauteed fennel and brown rice with a spinach arugula salad and pear vinaigrette.

not exactly christmas traditional. but darn good.  

and easy enough to make on a random tuesday night too. 

so i don't have to wait a whole year for it. :)

and that, my friends, was the christmas do over.

it is one day among many that draws me into a greater story.

it is a day for family memories..yes.  

it is a day to celebrate the beauty and the good and the dream of peace our hearts long for.. absolutely.

it is a day to reorient ourselves if we need some reorienting.

but the dream that is unfurling in my heart is that the gospel that broke open that first christmas morning is one to be lived every morning there after. 

it didn't just change one day.. it changed everything.

it made all things new. 

it woke us from that long sleep to a new life with new eyes and a new heart.

and that is a merry, merry christmas.