lessons learned in the school of halloween

so halloween is a real honest to goodness holiday.

can we agree on this?

i know she's controversial but...

she tastes like chocolate and sounds like laughter.  

 she feels like running down the sidewalks as fast as you can in the dark,

 trusting the concrete to be there even when you can't see it.

she's crisp air in your face and a sugar rush in your veins.

she smacks of possibility.

  

you can be blackbeard, clara barton, a cupcake or the very hungry caterpillar.

you can get free candy and your mom will let you eat it.

anything can happen. 

halloween is a time traveler.

she tethers me to the youth that lives in my heart if not in my body.

i only need a black cat mask to remember.

if you have been around here for long you remember that in years past we have rocked a serious family theme costume. there was the circus last year, and the wizard of oz before that.  this year the plan was to be 'the very hungry caterpillar'. nella was the caterpillar, i was an apple, grayson was an orange, nate was the 'hunk' of cheese, louie was the cupcake, and arianna was going to be the butterfly.

and then clara barton showed up.

i was way behind on costume related matters and our downtown trick or treating happened nearly a week before the real deal.
i wasn't ready.
i masked my lack of preparation  by declaring it a pick your own costume night.
the kids always help pick what they want to be in the theme and give ideas for their costumes but this was a free for all in the dress up.
we ended up with one very mad 'puffy pirate', due to the necessity of wearing a coat under his costume, one evil queen from snow white, and one cinderella.

so as the days dwindled before halloween arianna kept mentioning how much fun she had picking her own costume. 
she was dropping hints hot and heavy.
costume mutiny was in the works.
i will admit to you this... i didn't jump right on that.
i am a control freak.
we know this.
as much as i KNOW my goal is to raise creative, imaginative, independent kids... sometimes i balk at the actual releasing of creative, imaginative, independent kids.
particularly when creativity is happening inconveniently on the day before halloween and in my foresight i know my sewing/procuring skills will need to be utilized at the very last minute. 
but then i remembered... this means it's working. 
the freedom with creative expression, the empowering of visionary ideas and the dedication to see them through. 
it's happening...if i let it.

PLUS.. i still get to dress up the cupcake. :)

and blackbeard still needs help with his beard...

and charlie certainly can't put her costume on by herself...

and my "hunk"of cheese still wears a cheesehead. even though the whole 'theme' fell apart and being cheese now has no context except his love for me... which is greater than the whole darn state of wisconsin. ;) 

and these two.. clara barton and blackbeard. they owned the streets.

i could see it. 

they still need me.

but it's changing... they need me to believe in them.

that they can go and be and do...  with a little help still. ;)  

and so halloween was my teacher this year.

babies grow up and become clara barton.

it's a beautiful thing. :)

they ran ahead while cupcake and hunk o-cheese lagged behind...

and then cupcake needed to use the potty so the pumpkin, the big kids and i rocked the block in the name of candy.

arianna was in LOVE with her outfit. it was ridiculously sweet. she wore it nearly the whole day of halloween. she hurried about doing miscellaneous chores and being extremely helpful and when i asked her about it she said that her outfit made her feel 'old fashioned and very responsible'. :) 

after awhile we spotted a cheese head with a wagon.

the cupcake had given up.

this was the first halloween in years that i hadn't thrown a party at our house afterwards. we usually rush through trick or treating getting home in time to meet our guests. 

this year we were still going strong as darkness crept up... 

our creepy neighbor. :) seriously... that's creepy. 

by the end luci was just over it. stuffing falling out...sprinkle hat amiss.

i don't think she cracked a smile the whole night. 

she was not impressed with halloween.

we started a new tradition. 
instead of throwing  a party.. we went out to eat in our costumes. 
soooo much more laid back. i refuse to ruin holidays being stressed out about dumb stuff... and mercy of mercies if my friends don't feel just as loved hanging out the weekend before. :)  

the more kids i have the better person i am becoming. it sounds crazy but it's true. i've been brought to the end of what i can do... and that my friends, is a good thing... a freeing thing. 
an eat at Qdoba and enjoy no prep or clean up kind of thing.   

the sorting of the loot = hallowed ground of childhood memories.

it is truly amazing how quickly this...

becomes this...

all is well and happy and good.. until it's not. and then it's REALLY not. 

and halloween is over.

but the grace of it is that in the memory bank of time... the wrinkles are smoothed out.

the tears are forgotten, the costume angst is overshadowed..

halloween looks like this.

 

followed by november first and her breakfast of champions.
strong coffee and peanut butter cups snitched from the children's stash. 

happy november to us. :)